


Then you would be denying your own existence

by Autisticvampireclub



Series: Bmc spooky gay oneshots (yes that's what I'm calling it) [3]
Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Be More Chill au, Implied/Referenced Suicide attempt, M/M, My heart is hurting..., coarse language, ghost au, this is... the angstiest thing I've ever written
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-15
Updated: 2017-07-15
Packaged: 2018-12-02 08:09:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11505225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autisticvampireclub/pseuds/Autisticvampireclub
Summary: So they were a little lost... in the middle of a dark forest at night... but no worries, right?Michael wished he hadn't been so careless. Maybe then he wouldn't have lost him.





	Then you would be denying your own existence

**Author's Note:**

> This starts so innocent but then it gets so painfullllllllllllllll
> 
> Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

“Hey Mikey? Are you sure we're going the right way?”

Michael sighed as Jeremy shuffled along behind him. “Yes Jere, I'm positive we're going the right way. You should really trust in me more.”

“I do! It's just I don't want us getting lost in the woods at night. You know how freaked out I get in the dark!” Jeremy exclaimed.

They’d been trekking through the dark forest for at least half of the day. To be honest, Michael was a little worried they were lost, but he didn't show it. He was supposed to be leading.

Every sound made Jeremy jump. He was a nervous wreck. He didn't need anything else to worry about.

“Geez, it's like you're afraid a ghost is gonna pop out at ya” Michael teased him. Jeremy huffed. “Ghosts aren't real, Michael.”

“Sure they are!”

“No, their not.”

“Okay, if ghost aren't real then who moves my glasses from my bedside table every morning?” Michael argued. “I don't know, either it's one of your dad's or it's me!”

Michael gasped in mock offence. “JEREMIAH HEERE! You would dare DOUBLE CROSS me like this?! By making me believe my house is haunted, only to reveal it's you who's the dirty glasses stealing thief?! For shame…”

Jeremy rolled his eyes and chuckled. “You never know. Maybe I AM a ghost, and your house IS haunted. By me!”

“Then you would be denying your own existence.”

“Haven't we all.”

They both burst into laughter. Birds were startled out of the trees from how loud the noise was. The sky had completely darkened by now, and stars faintly twinkled up above.

After he caught his breath, Jeremy's expression twisted to one of concern. “Seriously Michael, do you have any idea where the hell you're going?”

“Relax, Jere-bear. We're almost out of the woods.” That was a lie. Michael had no idea if they were almost through or not. Jeremy squeaked. “I-I think I just… heard s-something…move…”

“It was probably just a raccoon or something, no worries” Michael reassured him. Jeremy was not convinced. “A-Are you sure? It sounded way bigger than a raccoon…”

“It's just your imagination playing tricks on you. Stick close to me and everything will be fine, I promise.” Jeremy quivered, but nodded. “O-Ok…”

They kept walking, Jeremy never drifting far from Michael. A slight breeze picked up. The breeze turned to a gust, and that gust turned to a strong wind. The wind shook the trees violently, and Michael's hair whipped in his face.

Jeremy’s footsteps started to get farther away. “You still with me Jere?”

No response.

“Jere? Hey Jere, don't leave me hanging…” Michael turned back to check on him.

He was gone. Completely vanished.

“Jeremy… Jeremy?!”

Michael called his name over and over into the rushing wind. No sound echoed back. Michael was all by himself. Jeremy had… disappeared…

“JEREMY?! JEREMMMMMYYYYY?!”

  
That was the last time Michael had ever saw Jeremy. That had been over a year ago. The memory still haunted him.

He had been found by a search and rescue team a day later. They had found him sobbing, still repeating his name over and over.

Jeremy… Jeremy…  
  
The worst part was… no one remembered him. No one remembered Jeremy after he disappeared. It was like he had been erased from existence.

Not even his own father remembered him. Which meant he didn't know Michael either… good bye to all those peaceful days at Jeremy's house… playing video games… not doing their homework…

Michael was depressed. Like, actually REALLY depressed. He couldn't share how he was feeling with anyone… because they couldn't understand.

He was mourning someone who wasn't real…

Michael knew he had been real though. He had to have been. All these memories Michael had of him… they weren't made up.

They couldn't be… could they…?

  
Wandering through the same forest he had over a year ago filled Michael with dread, and despair.

They were going to graduate together… but Michael had graduated alone. His best and only friend had been erased from existence. Michael had fallen apart.

No one could figure out what was wrong with him. They just knew ever since they had found him in that forest, something about him had changed. He was sadder… lonelier. To be fair, Michael had always been lonely, without any friends, but he always acted like he had… lost someone.

Boy, if only they knew.

The woods looked almost exactly the same as last time. The same creepy feeling radiated off the trees, and the air was thick with an unnatural aura.

Thankfully, the breeze was still. No rough winds blew through the trees tonight.

He wondered why he had come back here. Was it to find some proof Jeremy had really existed at some point? That was a pretty pointless endeavour… he had seen nothing so far that indicated such.

He really was hopeless. He had wanted to tell Jeremy so many things. About what he wanted to do when he got into college. About how he was already planning how the rest of their lives together would go. About how he felt… about Jeremy…

He had tried to end it so many times. Life was just useless without Jeremy. He never went through with it. ‘That's not what Jeremy would have wanted…’ he always told himself.

A gust of wind picked up. Oh no. He remembered this feeling…

“Michael…”

His entire body jerked around. He gaped in disbelief at who was standing a little ways behind him. It was Jeremy.

“J-Jeremy… JEREMY!!”

Michael rushed towards him. “HOLY FUCK JEREMY! I’VE MISSED YOU SO-”

He stopped in his tracks. Jeremy was glaring at him. It sent a chill down his spine. “J-Jeremy…?”

“So… you've finally come back for me. What, it only took you like… a year?” Jeremy curled his lip in disdain.

“I'm… sorry-”

“Sorry?! SORRY?! You abandon me in these woods and that's all you have to say to me?! You promised me… you promised me you would be with me, but you left me. I was so… scared… and lonely…” Jeremy looked close to tears now. Despite his aggressive tone, Michael reached out to comfort him. His hand phased right through Jeremy's body.

Jeremy scowled at him, as tears poured down his cheeks. “You see that? I'm fucking DEAD Michael. You're the one who left me here to die. All alone.”

Michael could feel tears of his own building up as Jeremy told him the harsh truth. “I-I… I didn't… Jeremy…”

“But it's okay now. I'm not going to be alone anymore.” Jeremy’s face shifted to a sinister grin. “Because if I'm trapped here forever…”

_**“I'm trapping you here with me.”** _

Michael’s breath hitched. He slowly backed away from Jeremy. Then he ran.

_**“Running is useless Michael… I'll still catch you…”** _

He ignored him. He kept running. Faster and faster through the trees. Everything around him was a blur.

_**“You can't hide from me… you can't hide from all the pain you've caused me…”** _

Michael could feel himself exhausting. No, had to keep running, had to keep running…

_**“Just stop. Surrender. You know you deserve this fate… didn't you want to be with me forever?”** _

Michael was slowing down. Sweat dripped down his forehead. What was the point? What Jeremy said was all true…

_**“That's right. There is no point. You know the truth now.”** _

Michael stopped, and dropped to his knees. His entire body ached. Why resist… he had wanted this so many times before…

He looked behind him. Jeremy was smirking down at him.

So… this is how it ended…

At least now they'd always be together… forever.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
> 
> (So anyways, what should the next oneshot be about? I'm always open to suggestions!)


End file.
